AITAH for breaking up my dad’s relationship?
My dad’s gf told me and my sister our pajamas shorts are inappropriate, and can’t be walking around the house without a bra because it’s weird and disrespectful to the man of the house.
For context, my dad’s (47) been dating this girl (28) for six months—at the time—and finally started bring her to the house. Let’s call her Ashley. He wanted my sister (16) and I (23 F) to bond with Ashley so we all went to those escape rooms. Things went great so he started letting her come to the house, slowly. Keep in mind this is over the course of three more months.
Things were fine while Ashley came around. But then she made a comment on how I should serve my dad, because “he’s had a long day and it’s the polite thing to do”. My mother was very traditional and hispanic, so manners were very much beaten into me. If my dad is busy with work or occupied, I’m thoughtful enough to serve him and so on. I was raise to be considerate of family. But it’s not my job to serve him when he doesn’t want to come to the table after being called on. I told her, “he can serve himself”, brushing the comment off—this would be the first of many.
The second flag was when she slept over the first time. She got too drunk to drive home and it was late, so my dad let her stay. Everyone was chilling by morning, getting ready. As I got out of my room to do my laundry, she’s in the kitchen. She began conversation and shifted it to the laundry, saying “you’re doing just your laundry? What about everyone else?” I explained to Ashley I do my own laundry and my sister and dad do theirs together. Then she says “so he folds the clothes? Your sister should learn to take more responsibility. It’s not good to be selfish.” I bit my tongue, and went to my dad.
He said he talked to Ashley, but it clearly did nothing because it began to feel like I was competing with her. Everything had a snarky comment. She even brought up to my dad how she’s “suprised I still live with him. Most kids would moved out by now.” My dad informed her, it’s both a cultural and religious thing for us, as kids aren’t expected to move out until marriage and even then he rather me be home than doing god knows what.
Everything goes downhill after she told me I shouldn’t be calling my dad “Papi” at my age because it was weird and had a sexual connotation to it. I start getting into it with her, and my sister explains how it’s a cultural thing. We let it go, fast forward two weeks later.
My dad and her go on a date and come back in the evening to my sister and I dressed comfortably. That clearly bother her because she tells me to go put on a bra because my “tits” are showing. I’m cussing her out at this point. Then she calls our baggy shirts and short revealing, attention seeking, and how we should be ashamed to be dressing this way around my dad and much less living with him.
We get into an altercation, my sister and dad pull me off her. I give my dad an ultimatum between me or her, or “I’ll remind him of mom for the rest of his life”. The night ends with him dropping her off. It’s been a few days, now things feel awkward. My sister told me I shouldn’t have hit her or brought up mom (our mother past away four years ago).
I did apologize for mentioning mom but my dad is acting like nothing wrong. He’s dropping off her shit today and give it back but now I feel like the vibes are off. I tried having a conversation again today but he told me it’s alright, which made me feel bad. Edited: the reason I ask is because my dad is not talking to me. He’s responding to me with one word answers for that past few days and my sister is just saying to wait it out and until he’s over anything. AITAH?
