AITAH for firing the nanny because she keeps using my bathroom?
I (31M) have a daughter (1). I’m a single dad so I hired a live in nanny (Emma, 27) to help take care of my daughter when I’m at work. When Emma moved in, I told her to please not enter my room and bathroom unless it was necessary. I didn’t want to look like a douche by locking my doors so I just asked her to not enter my room.
I started realising that Emma would shower in my bathroom. I would come home and the floor of the shower would be wet and some stuff would be out of place. I’m a neat guy so I know I didn’t leave my sink like that, and water from my morning shower usually dries by the time I get home.
About 2 months ago, I get home and there’s blood and a tampon in my toilet. I mean I knew that Emma had been using my bathroom but it hadn’t hit me till then. I left my room and asked her if her bathroom works ok, if the shower is fine and all. She said yeah it’s fine. I asked why she had been using mine then. She looked at me without answering for a few seconds then said “sorry, I won’t do it again”. I accepted that and told her to let me know if there’s something she wants changed or fixed in her bathroom and we’ll get to it.
2 days later, blood and a tampon in my toilet, and a wet shower floor, again. At this point I got very agitated. She had gone to bed by the time I noticed so I asked her about it the next morning before I left for work. I asked her why she had used my bathroom again if there’s nothing wrong with her bathroom. She said the same thing she said before “sorry, I won’t do it again”. I told her frankly if she enters my room or bathroom without a good reason again, I’m not going to be willing to have her in my home anymore and we can cancel the contract.
Things were fine for a while after that. I thought of just locking my door but I wanted to see if she’d actually keep her word and not enter my room or bathroom again. She didn’t (from what I could tell) so it was fine. On Saturday, I took my daughter to the park and the plan was to run my errands after that but my daughter got really fussy so we just came back home. When we walked through the door, I heard a door shut upstairs, footsteps, then another door opening and closing.
I thought maybe she had gone to my daughters room for something but when I entered my room, there was an empty coffee mug on my bedside table. It wasn’t mine. Nothing else was out of place or weird but that was evidence enough that she had been in my room again. I asked her why she had been in my room this time. She didn’t say anything and just stared at me. I said I’ve had enough of her not following a very simple rule and I don’t want to be uncomfortable in my own home because of her. I said we will cancel the contract and I will pay her the fee for that.
She didn’t argue with me or defend herself. I told my two friends what happened because I asked them to help me find a new nanny. They laughed and asked if I’m seriously firing her over something like that. They said she didn’t steal anything or do anything terrible so it’s stupid for me to have fired her. I thought I was totally justified but they’ve made me rethink it a bit now. AITAH?
