AITA for Telling My Husband to Stop Giving Me Advice While We Were Bowling?
Hi Reddit, this is my first time posting here, but something happened tonight that I can’t stop thinking about.
Tonight, my husband and I went bowling with his family. They’ve never really liked me, though we’ve somewhat made amends over time. I have chronic health issues that often make it difficult for me to go out and do things, but I pushed myself to go because I wanted to be there with my husband.
Out of the ten people there, I was by far the worst bowler. That alone was already embarrassing. What made it worse was that every time I threw a gutter ball, my husband would walk up to me while I was getting ready for my second shot and start giving me advice on how to improve.
I already have a lot of anxiety about bowling and being in large groups, and honestly, I didn’t even want to bowl in the first place. It was supposed to be just for fun, but I ended up feeling humiliated. He kept saying things like, “You’re releasing the ball too early,” “Aim this way,” or “Throw it like this.” Instead of helping, it just made me more nervous and made me perform even worse.
At the beginning of the night, I told him multiple times that his advice wasn’t helping and that it was making me more anxious. His brothers’ wives weren’t doing great either, but they weren’t doing terribly, and it felt like he was embarrassed by how poorly I was doing.
He says he was genuinely trying to help and was just being nice. But I’ve told him many times before that I don’t like being “coached,” especially in front of other people. It keeps happening because he’s usually been drinking and forgets.
When we talked about it afterward, he acted like I was wrong and ungrateful for his help. Now I feel guilty for telling him I didn’t want his advice, especially since it was just a game.
Was I wrong for feeling this way? Should I have just been grateful for the help as he suggested?
