“I have a family shattering secret about my uncle/aunt and I want so badly to drop the bomb and ghost.”
When I was around 6-years-old my favorite auntie started dating a new guy. He came around a lot and my family seemed to like him. He would sometimes bring his son from is prior marriage around with him. I didn’t particularly like this kid. He would whine and cry a lot but he was only around 3 so I guess that was normal for his age.
Anyway, fast forward a couple of years and my aunt moves back to my uncle’s home country with him. After a couple of years they get married and after a few more they have 2 kids. They came back and forth a lot to visit and after about 8 years abroad they decide to move back to the states.
Cool. Kids are growing up and the world is moving on. During college I lived with them on and off because they were close to my school. One day out of the blue I remembered my uncle’s first kid. I casually just asked my aunt when we’re alone what the hell happened to him and why we don’t see him around anymore.
She immediately went red. “Don’t you EVER bring him up in this house again! Understand!? If you bring this up around the family I will kill you with my own two hands. I never wanted that kid in our lives and bringing it up now will ruin everything so keep your mouth shut.”
The worst part? Uncle’s ex offed herself 10 or so years back and his son was left homeless. I tried to reach out and help but couldn’t get a hold of him. Saddest of all he ended up hooked on god knows what and last I saw of him was a mugshot in the Bay Area. He accosted an elder gentleman who found him sleeping in his bushes 🙁
It just breaks my heart that this little boy I remember is now in this horrible place in life because my disgustingly selfish aunt and uncle couldn’t bother to include him in their lives. My little cousins don’t know they have a brother somewhere out there and that my aunt and uncle knowingly abandoned him.
This knowledge has made me resent them ever since. I’m childfree but I couldn’t give my dog up less yet my OWN CHILD ffs. I hate my uncle the most because he’s a hypocritical monster who’s really great at buying people’s geniality but has a nasty temper and turns into a psychopath when he snaps.
My mom and dad remember this kid but they don’t say a word to keep the family peace. I KNOW that if my cousins found out they’d be shattered. They’re good kids. Recently my uncle was cheering on the mass d**ths of people in the mid-east and also talking about how happy he was with everything going on in America right now, even with the children being ripped from their families and j**led.
Hearing that made my blood boil and now I just want to announce his dirty secret to everyone so he can exposed. I come from a very tight knit family who I know would look down on him for this.
They ruined the life of an innocent child to be where they’re at and I just feel like they deserve for it all to burn down. If I did this I legitimately would be in fear for my life. My uncle and aunt don’t play about their family and I 100% believe they would try to kill me if I exposed them.
Here’s what people had to say to OP:
Naive_Rent5563 wrote:
People who abandon their own child and then act morally superior are the worst kind of hypocrites.
This is one of those situations where there’s no clean ending. Whatever you choose, you’re not the villain here.
OP responded:
Ah yes, that’s the word “morally superior”. One time my uncle was speaking in praise of my own toxic father who he looked up to for not abandoning our family because “that’s what men did back in our home country all the time”…and I just stared at him blankly because what he said was not only insanely disgusting it was also what HE did to his own family…I was like are we all just going to gloss over this?
mirewen15 wrote:
My sister’s ex in-laws did this. His son from a previous relationship was tossed aside for his new family (ex BIL and his younger brother). The son ended up addicted and homeless in East Vancouver. He died alone in the streets. Such a shitty situation no one is allowed to bring up. I’m sorry you’re carrying this burden with you. They are terrible people.
OP responded:
My biggest fear is that the kid is dead 🙁
Simple_Extension2092 wrote:
Who’s to say you’re not already in danger because you know?
OP responded:
My aunt knows I remember bc of our convo, uncle doesn’t and my aunt is so afraid of him she wouldn’t tell him that I know for fear he’d lash out preemptively.
unhappy-camper- wrote:
This post and these comments make me feel like I’m taking crazy pills. Do you have the slightest idea what happened? Like, do you know for a fact your uncle abandoned this kid? Or are you just assuming? There could be other reasons to cut off a teenager (from the timeline on this) and be upset when he’s brought up. Maybe he passed.
Maybe he hurt your aunt/uncle/cousins. Maybe he’s an a*****. That’s just off the top of my head You have no idea what happened and seem to be relishing the idea of dropping this “bombshell” to hurt your uncle, completely omitting the fact that you might really hurt your cousins as well.
OP responded:
I know for a fact that he stopped making any effort to stay in touch after he moved back to his home country simply because he was too busy with work and travelled abroad a lot to do negotiations and stuff. He just “got busy” and soon it was harder and harder for his son to get in contact.
This is in the days before everyone had a cell phone let alone a smart phone on them 24/7. It was easy to lose contact with a person who moved abroad. He was 6 when they moved away and I highly doubt he did anything to hurt my uncle and aunt.
He fell onto hard times after his mom passed and he was in his very early 20s. My uncle had plenty of time to reach out and find him but it was too convenient not to. I have zero empathy for someone who continuously makes selfish and damaging choices over and over again over their lifetime.
Molatov_bubblebath wrote:
I know how tempting it is to out these monsters, unfortunately it might blow back onto you. Especially given your aunt has already threatened to kill you. Tread lightly. If you think you can expose them for who they really are (and they do sound absolutely dreadful) tell the people you trust the most.
If there’s a scintilla of a chance you’ll get hurt, let it go. I tried outing a truly awful family member a few years ago and they twisted everything around to make me seem like I was nuts. Shockingly, far too many people believed them and I’ve now lost relationships and it wasn’t even something as big as this. Good luck.
OP responded:
Yeah I just don’t feel like the fallout is worth it right now. Especially since he seems to be exposing his true self over time with my family anyway. They’re all starting to wake up to the reality that he’s just a charming sweet talker who’s really a charlatan and hypocrite under it all. Glad they’re slowly starting to see him for who he really is.
Susiec0161 wrote:
Do you have the full story though? He may have put your aunt and uncle through a terrible time.
OP responded:
He abandoned his kid at 6 years old…
background-war9535 wrote:
If you do, get yourself to safety first. Then, drop the bomb. These people are petty and hypocritical and deserve it.
OP responded:
I live in his home country now with my cousins nearby. Physically I’m very far away but they know where I live soooo
Icy_Letterhead4893 wrote:
Drop the bomb and vanish because your aunt’s threat is the ultimate proof that their perfect life is a pathetic house of cards. If your uncle loves watching the world burn let him enjoy the fire starting in his own living room. Blow the lid off this circus and ghost because justice is best served with absolute silence.
