AITA for refusing to give my sister my old engagement ring after my divorce?
I (30F) had a divorce last year. It was mutual, notting dramatic. I kept the engagement ring since I help pay for it (we split the cost because we’re young and we’re both on our first job). And honestly I just wasn’t ready to get rid of it yet. Even if it didn’t work out I still value the ring.
My younger sister (25F) just got engaged. Her fiance doesn’t make much money but he proposed with a really cute but simple ring. My sister recently asked if she could buy my engagement ring for a lower price since I’m not using it anymore. It would also save them money to upgrade her ring later on (they want to get a ” nicer ring” later on).
I was a little shocked and told her no. I don’t wear it but I don’t want to sell it either. She said it’s weird and “emotionally unhealthy” that I’m holding onto a ring from a failed marriage. Now our parents are hinting I should just give or sell it to her because it would be a nice gesture , and better than sitting in a drawer. AITA?
Here’s what people had to say to OP:
Your mom can give her ring away. Or tell your dad to sell his car for cheap so she can trade it for a ring. NTA, no is a complete sentence.
Or they can use the simple ring the fiance proposed with instead of making it clear to the fiance that the ring and he are both lacking. Why should OP give up her ring for a relationship that is clearly doomed?
A friend of mine got engaged with a plastic ring from one of those old toy dispensers where you put a quarter in and got a toy. They, over the next few decades, got promotions, raises, and “upgraded” to an expensive diamond ring on a big anniversary. She loves that piece of plastic that her husband gave her when they were young and broke.
Asking someone else to hand over money (and a ring is worth money, so no different) so you can have a “nicer” engagement ring is ridiculous. Pushing and acting entitled to someone else’s money is next level.
Yeah man…isn’t that bad karma?
If I was OP, I’d have the diamond(?) made into a nice pendant, or keep it to sell it later, if OP needs money some time in the future.
For the present, I’d put the ring in a safe deposit box/bank vault so it doesn’t “accidentally” go missing from OP’s home.
ETA: clarity
ETA 2: And, if OP decides to make it into a pendant or other jewelry, don’t tell anyone where the stone originated. That’ll get op mor grief.
Your parents should be discouraging little sis from getting married if her finances are such that she wants a ring but can’t afford it.
