AITA for telling a woman at the gym to stop filming because I kept ending up in her videos?
I (31M) go to the same gym most mornings before work. Its a normal chain gym like no one of those influencer gyms but people still record sets sometimes. There are signs about not filming other members without consent but its not like it never happens.
A few weeks ago this woman (I’ll call her Jenna) started setting up a tripod near the cable machines, I didnt care like i’m not trying to police anyone I just did my workout and stayed out of the way.
But then I kept noticing I was showing up in her videos anyway in the background. One day I was doing lateral raises and her phone was pointed straight through the mirror so you could see a big chunk of the floor behind her. I only noticed because I could literally see myself in the mirror on her screen when I walked past. I’m not saying she was doing it on purpose but I also dont want to be in some stranger’s videos at 7am when I’m half awake and sweaty.
The first time I said something I tried to keep it casual. I waited until she was between sets and said “hey, I think I’m in the background of that, would you mind adjusting it a bit?” She sighed, moved it slightly and said she was just recording her form.
A week later it happened again and this time I said more directly “I’m not comfortable being in your videos, can you point it away from the main floor or keep it tighter?” She got annoyed and said if I dont comfortable I can work out somewhere else cause its a public gym.
That’s when I got frustrated, I told her its not public, its a private business and I’m not the one filming. She rolled her eyes and walked away.
So I went to the front desk and asked what the actual policy is. They told me filming is allowed but if someone doesnt want to be in your shot you’re supposed to adjust and staff can step in if it keeps being an issue. I told them I’d already asked her twice. They went over and spoke to her.
After that she concerned me near the lockers and said I was a creep for “watching her”, that I’m trying to control women at the gym and that now she feels targeted and anxious to come in.
Now I’m sitting here wondering if I escalated it to far. I just dont want to be in somebody’s content. But I also get how how going to staff can look like a bigger move than just letting it go.
AITA?
Here’s what people had to say to OP:
Odd-End-1405 said:
NTA. She is trying to manipulate you by pulling the “anxious and nervous” card to make you feel bad so you will not continue to call her out on her inappropriate behavior.
Moose-Live said:
You are NTA. She’s taking videos that include you, without consent, then corners you at the lockers to tell you you’re making her feel unsafe. Please report this to management and don’t engage with her directly in future.
silentjudge_ said:
NTA. You didn’t go too far, you did exactly what was within your right to do. The gym rules are clear and she doesn’t get to play the victim when she’s the one breaking them.
caprahircus_ said:
NTA. You asked her twice, she ignored you, so you escalated the issue to a member of staff who told her off. I am the kind of person who is very happy to call a man a creep, but in this instance, so long as you are being 100% honest in your description of the events, you are not being a creep and you shouldn’t have to be in her videos if you don’t want to be. Also, it’s obnoxious to film yourself working out.
justtobecontrary said:
Wow, she sure jumped in that victim pool quickly, didn’t she? NTA.
Vivid-Isopod-7018 said:
Nta someone would make a killing setting an “influencer only gym” I hate people who do that crap in public.
WickedAngelLove said:
NTA but you need to talk to the managers at the gym if this lady keeps doing it
