AITAH for breaking my boyfriends $1000 pool stick?
I (20F) have been dating my boyfriend (21M) for almost 4 years now. In January 2025 we moved in together. Whenever we had first moved in he was working doing tree work. Each tree job would pay around 300-400 dollars. This really helped with our bills since I didnt make nearly as much as him. For reference I work full time nights at a mid sized hospital as a phlebotomist.
Our rent was $1200 and then we also had electric, gas, wifi, and our phone plan. All of this together was a total of around $1600 each month.
We started off paying everything 50/50. This worked out really well for us because it left us with a couple hundred dollars at least after all of the bills were paid.
One day, out of the blue he tells me that he doesn’t want to do tree work anymore. I tell him okay and that I completely support his decision to look for a new job.
I didn’t realize that meant he was going to quit his job right then and there without any notice or back up plan.
That left me with all of our bills the following month. I was perfectly fine with paying them by myself as I figured he was looking for a new job and would be able to help me out the following month. He was not. Every day when I would come home from work he would be in the same spot. Sitting at his desk playing on his playstation.
Every day I asked him if he had applied to any jobs. I got the same answer every time. It was always either “nothing I really like” or “no, I havent had time”.
For awhile I was dealing with it. Then after 3 months, I started to struggle. I started doing doordash, instacart, spark, anything I could to make some extra money. This was especially hard for me due to working night shift and needing my sleep during the day.
Every once in a while he would come with me to complete orders to help us make a little extra money. This would only last so long though. He usually would only come with me for about an hour until he decided he wanted to go home and get on his playstation.
Then, he started playing pool at the bar. He would go to tournaments on Tuesdays, and have a league on Sundays. At first, I was happy that he found a hobby that he enjoyed. I even bought him a $1000 pool stick that he had been begging me for. Now, it has become a problem.
At this point, he hasnt had a job for around 8 months. I am completely struggling and receive no help from him. Every day I hear the same thing, “I am going to shoot pool for a couple hours. Can I have $20?”. I can’t lie, I am a little bit of a pushover and I always give in and give him the money that he asks for. But lately, he has been playing pool every single day. And I am not even being dramatic. I mean EVERY single day for at least 4 hours.
It has gotten to the point of me crying every day about financial struggles while he is having the time of his life playing pool.
2 days ago, I finally reached my breaking point. I had just gotten off of work and was about to take a shower and get ready to go do a couple of instacart orders to make some money for groceries. I go to walk into our bedroom and he is standing there dressed with his pool stick in his hand. I must of had a bad night because I completely lost it. I took his pool stick out of his hand and hit it on the corner of our dresser. The wood split all the way down.
He immediately loses it and calls me all sorts of names such as crazy b**** and dumba** hoe. I am standing there with his pool stick in my hand crying. He leaves our house to go play pool anyways and hasn’t been back since. I have tried reaching out to him and have gotten no response. I even offered to pay for repairs on it or even replace it all together, but I have received no response.
AITAH?
