“A guest threatened the pregnant photographer at a wedding…”
I’m a wedding coordinator, and for the most part I haven’t had too many bad guest stories. However, a few months back I worked a wedding where a guest got into a HUGE argument with the photographers in the middle of the reception, and I’m still cringing over it.
Basically what happened is that the couple (my clients) had booked a husband and wife photography team like a year out from their wedding. This is obviously pretty standard, because good photographers book up pretty early and your photographer is usually one of the first vendors you book.
A couple of months later, the photography team contacted the clients and informed them that the wife was pregnant. The timing worked out so that she would be about eight months long by the time their wedding rolled around, so they assured the clients that they would still be able to shoot their wedding unless something completely unexpected happened like an early delivery.
When the day of the wedding arrived, the photographers showed up on time, they were super friendly and very professional for the entire event, and I honestly had a great time working with them.
The problem came at dinner. I typically tell vendors to take their dinner break while the couple is eating, because there’s not really anything going on that needs to be photographed while the bride and groom are sitting at their table.
Apparently, one of the guests who was a longtime family friend did not agree with this. She noticed the photographers sitting outside and having their meal (they were literally sitting down for MAYBE 15 minutes), and became upset when she noticed that the EXTREMELY PREGNANT photographer had propped her feet up on the base of the outdoor coffee table.
Keep in mind, this was in the outside area – all the guests were inside, and the only people around were a couple of other vendors who were taking a short break to eat. My understanding is that this particular guest was so upset with the photographers that she walked outside, pointed her phone at them, and snapped a photo. Then she walked back inside without another word.
This obviously was concerning to the photographers, so the husband of the team followed her inside and asked her why she had taken a picture of his wife. She replied that she “wanted to have a photo attached” to the review that was going to leave on all of their social media platforms.
The husband became immediately furious, and it was at this point that I looked over and saw that they were having a very tense interaction so I walked over to see what was going on.
The photographer informed me about the woman’s behavior and her threats to leave a negative review, and then the guest in question tried to justify her behavior by saying that the photographers should have been inside taking pictures of people enjoying the food instead of outside with their feet propped up.
I explained to her that they were taking their scheduled dinner break, and that I had instructed them to do so, and that I had discussed the timing of dinner breaks with my clients well before the event. She wouldn’t hear it. She said that vendors should not be eating somewhere visible because it made them look unprofessional and gave the impression that they didn’t care about their job.
She was also upset because the wife of the team had worn a loose fitting, flowy T-shirt dress and sneakers when she felt that she should’ve been dressed in more formal attire. Again, I tried to explain that photographers wear appropriate but COMFORTABLE clothing because they’re moving around a lot and need to be able to squat, crouch, bend, etc.
Thankfully the mother of the bride noticed the argument and walked over to convince her friend to calm down, and we were able to defuse (thank you, English teacher) the situation. The mother of the bride also reassured the photographers that they had done nothing wrong and that she was very grateful for their help…
So I was grateful that the MOB had my back. I was also very grateful that dinner was so noisy that most of the guests did not notice, and I don’t think my clients even found out what had happened until the next day.
What was especially frustrating to me is that this wedding guest had spent most of the morning explaining to me that she and her husband used to own a wedding venue – so for her to behave that way and act like it was a huge shock to her that vendors would need a dinner break was wild.
She even made a comment implying that if the wife was pregnant, she shouldn’t have taken the job. Any experienced venue owner would know that wedding photographers book up months or even a year plus in advance, and that they typically honor their contracts even through pregnancy. It was like she thought that the photographers had booked these clients a week beforehand.
I even might’ve understood her point if the photographers had been lazy or late or not doing their job well, but they weren’t. They were on time, they were active and aware of the schedule, and I didn’t have a single problem with them the entire night. Definitely my craziest experience with a guest.
Here’s what people had to say to OP:
oldtimeyloser said:
I’m willing to bet that the “wedding venue” she owned was just a restaurant or something that happened to have a wedding there once. Or that they bought a defunct wedding venue and never actually hosted a wedding there. Good for you for standing up for the photographers!
Dunderman35 said:
Bride’s mother probably knew this particular one was a crazy Karen. And then probably multiplied even more by wedding freakout. Thank god for her.
Bean-Snail said:
I wish someone would interrupt that trifling woman’s next meal. Good for you for remaining professional.
VivianDiane said:
That guest was way out of line. Pregnant or not, vendors deserve breaks, and basic respect.
StarryNorth said:
I’m constantly astounded by the number of belligerent, contentious, and hostile people in this world. They were at a wedding, for pete’s sake. That guest has some major psychological issues that cross over into the realm of inappropriate and antisocial behavior. She needs help. I’m so glad OP was able to manage the situation and stand up for the photographers.
mama9873 said:
I cannot with people like this. They’re the same ones who get mad if they see a nurse with coffee bc it’s “unprofessional” or whatever BS. People don’t stop being humans when they go to work, they still have needs they’re allowed to attend to.
I can’t imagine having so little to worry about in life that I’d have the time or energy to get worked up about seeing a pregnant woman sit down and eat for 15 minutes. Smdh.
